project-lemonade

Project Lemonade

When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade! Make life take the lemons back!
Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these?
Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons!
Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down—with the lemons!

— Cave Johnson, Founder of Aperture Science (from Portal 2)

What is this?

Project Lemonade is a series of programs planned (and sometimes even created!) during my mandatory military service.

In the military, I regularly get disconnected from the rest of the world entirely as there is no such thing as internet on the sea. (This does not imply that I have internet access when moored, though.) That is, these programs are 100% built by me while banging my head against the mess hall table suffering from hypo-stackoverflow syndrome.

Here are some features shared by the Project Lemonade programs:

  1. Unintelligible gibberish source code
  2. Questionable language choices
  3. Topics which no sane people will choose

Many of the programs are left in the isolated computer in the ship, so most of the programs are re-written from my incomplete recollection of the source code. Some sources that I was able to print out and bring to society are heavily updated since. So… Technically, I’m not breaking any rules. Just letting you know!

Okay, but why these languages?

……They do beg for this question, don’t they?

Like any other military organizations in other countries, South Korea Navy requires thorough screening for any binaries that are installed on devices connected to the Korean military intranet. Therefore, I had to come up with something that I can get my hands on. Although a version of Anaconda distribution of Python was available, its massive size made its installation virtually impossible over a satellite network with 10Kbps bandwith, 95% of which are already not available for a low-rank soldier like me.

Then, I was left with the following choices:

Of course, Python and JavaScript is just boring at this point, so I decided to spice things up by choosing exotic languages that no one uses.

Yep, at the end of the day, I wanted to be a hipster.

List of programs

Name Description
powershell-raytracing Raytracing in One Weekend implementation in PowerShell.
hancell-raytracing Raytracing in One Weekend implementation in Hancom Office Hancell VBA.
quantumshell Quantum computer emulator written in PowerShell.
nsns Naval Ship Nogari System, a simple web image board written in PowerShell.
church-lamb Simple Church encoding evaluator for untyped lambda calculus.